A little piece of me

   Having 2 toddlers, I sometimes sit back and watch them interact. The inner monologue that follows goes something like this. .
  " Holy Cow, did they learn that from me? Please don't say what I think you are going to say. Why on EARTH do you DO that?!?! I really hope they don't get their fathers genes for ..."
   After one of these moments the other day I really started thinking about where we learn things that come so natural to us. Honestly, why do I dislike certain bands? Where did I learn to love seafood? Why do certain things make us laugh? And then I started recalling all of the people in my life, who I thought were fairly insignificant, and the ones that I knew were big in my past, but did not realize had shaped so much of my present as well.
   For instance. . . My very first Best Friend's name was Cayse. We lived down the street from each other. She had a love for popping the tar bubbles at the end of the street. Random right? We used to sit and pop all the bubbles that came up wherever we could find them, and talk about barbies and what we were going to be when we grew up. We also spied on her sisters, so I sure hope they are not reading this. . Luckily the spying did not stick, but the love for absent mindedly popping things never did.  I still enjoy fiddling while I talk. I love the sound that things make when they pop, even if it is loud enough to startle me. It brings me joy. We moved away from each other when I was 6.
   My Barbies used to have a pickup truck that I would put a plastic baggie in the bed of and fill up with water (when my mother was not looking of course) and allow Barbie and Ken to swim while they were riding around town( my room), One day I saw an El Camino. . It was love at first sight. It would be perfect for a full size version of my car-pool. .. . I still want one. . My husband thinks I am weird, but somewhere along the line it turned from any El Camino to a rusted out one with a CD player, and a built in GPS... . Because nobody would expect it. And its amazing.
   Soft Rock reminds me of my dad and road trips, I can only eat cinnamon Graham Crackers and they have to be eaten sugar side down, with milk. I refuse to walk inside a fast food place and order from the counter. I have to have a throw pillow when I sit on the couch and I can't drive with my shoes on. I love fuzzy socks and I can't STAND the feeling of micro fiber pockets. I don't like dark chocolate, and Ian thinks I pronounce the word "curtains" wrong. I refuse to eat at a table alone, and I don't like tennis shoes. I can't stand sports, and I love fishing. the smell of Red Bull makes me want to yak, and the idea of Vodka after my trip to Germany turns my stomach. From that trip though I also learned to love Nutella and I think that is a fair trade!- I can tell you exactly where all of these preferences came from.
   Certain friendships have developed out of a short term "boyfriend" that at this point I do nothing but laugh at the idea of, but the girl who liked that guy, I couldn't stand- for all of 2 weeks and then we were best friends for the rest of high school... Now I have 2 pretty close friends. . and none of us talk to those silly boys anymore.
   One of my favorite things in the world is the smell of fall. The smell of decomposing leaves, and fire in the air. The chilly wind blowing past my face while the sun warms my skin. The beauty of the leaves changing and the smell of pumpkins. The taste of pumpkins. . Until I started thinking of where these aspects of our personalities come from, I had no idea where this even started. I am a November Baby, and while by the time my birthday rolls around it is way too chilly to be hanging around outside, and all the leaves have fallen already, everyone assumes this is the reason. It's not. I may be one of the weirdest people ever, but I loved loved loved the beginning of the school year. I also love riding with the windows down. and comfy clothes. After a summer of riding in a car with a boy whose car had no AC, fall was seriously a glorious season. It reminds me of nights sitting outside on a porch swing and talking with my highschool boyfriend and wearing his hoodies, warm rain, sitting up all night talking and a general time of happiness and carefree period of my life. That is where it started, but After moving to Roanoke for college the fall season in the valley was the most beautiful thing I had ever seen.
   Little things that are less meaningful in my life bring back smaller memories. . like the fact that school buses make me uncomfortable, for more than one reason. And silver mustangs make me laugh. The smell of nail polish reminds me of my favorite shirt from middle school and how it was ruined by some yellow nail polish. My fondness for the movie Mac and Me , as it reminds me of my friends little sister when she was first born. The memory of telling the same friends sisters that fruits and veggies were bad for them and ice cream should only be eaten before breakfast. . . I still sneak some before my morning coffee when the kids are not watching on occasion. The way I fold my towels, in thirds not halves, because I would get yelled at by Memaw, or every time I hear the term "French Kissing" it makes me laugh because the first time I was caught making out with a boy it was by one of my best friends little brothers. He went home and told his mom we were "Chinese kissing"  I remember Mrs. Reed's lecture and analogies like it was yesterday. . And the fact that even though I own the movie King Kong, I can't watch it, because it reminds me of a terrible breakup.
   I have always believed that everything happens for a reason, a firm advocate of never regretting anything, because everything that has ever happened to you has formed you into the person you are today. Even I did not realize how large some of those small instances were. . I also have an irrational fear of putting my shoes on before looking inside of them, and an insatiable love for cheesecake and soup when I am not feeling well.